


Darkness

by LuciferFanfics



Category: Original Work
Genre: Late Night Conversations, Late Night Writing, Other, References to Depression
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-26
Updated: 2018-11-26
Packaged: 2019-08-29 18:42:52
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 521
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16749562
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LuciferFanfics/pseuds/LuciferFanfics
Summary: Just a late night thought I had while feeling depressed.





	Darkness

Depression is a strange thing. Your mind becomes invaded by a deep darkness you can't help but fall into. It pops up so suddenly that you don't know where it began or where it ends. It's just there; always collecting itself at the edge of your mind, ready to pounce at any moment. It talks to you; makes you believe the lies it tells you. Its always over-analysing experiences, and presents it in a persuasive essay, to fit its viewpoint. It clouds your mind's eye in a haze till it's all that occupies your mind. It's like the Devil sitting on your shoulder telling you what way is up and down, left or right. But its secretly telling you the opposite.  
How do you keep yourself from crumbling, when every paranoia, every thought threatens to push you down. It almost seems Impossible. The strong and confident voice you once had, is drowned out by the pain and guilt your own mind produces. It's like the body attacking itself to the point that its torture. Depression is the torture of one's own mind. It collects all the words, the expressions, the body languages of others and wraps it into something so negative that it suffocates you. You feel like you're drowning, and sinking further down to the depths below. The deepest of darkness is not felt by many; yet felt by everyone at the same time. No two people's depression is the same and that's the scariest thing of all. How do you ever know when someone is suffering? The funny thing about it is someone could be so totally fine; but behind that carefully built wall, is someone desperately crying for help.

For the people on the other side, it is the most heartbreaking thing of all. To watch someone lose themselves to their own darkness. To feel so helpless because you can neither see, nor fight the battle going on in that person's head. It's like losing a battle you never fought to begin with. They only thing you can do is shower them with love and light. But then you ask yourself is that ever enough? Is it enough to bring someone back from the edge and show them their worth? You constantly ask yourself, "Why was I not observant enough"? "Did I not show I cared enough?" "Why was I so late"? "How do I forgive myself for the things I did notice; but never followed up"? "I let someone close to me suffer and I didn't do anything". Do I deserve forgiveness?" It's these thoughts that can start a vicious cycle that is so easy to fall into. At the end of the day, you can only keep moving forward. With people who care for you and with the right help. A quote I heard once said, 'People are going to tell you who you are your whole life. But you just have to punch back and so no, this is who I am'. It's the same for the darkness. Don't let the darkness win; because the darkness is there to make you shine your brightest light.


End file.
